Asher Leon Cohen arrives!

Asher Leon Cohen
October 21, 2007 at 6:55pm
6 lbs 14 ozs - 20 1/4 inches long
Photo Credits to Rachael, Jeannine and Aaron

NOTICE FROM WEBMASTER: In lieu of money, please send gifts.
(You are strongly encouraged to do so by the mother.)
The kids are registered at these websites: www.obabybaby.com and www.babyworldonline.net
under the name of Jeannine and Aaron Cohen, which is fitting since that is their name.
Give lots, give often!

My, oh my, oh my... Jeannine and Aaron took a long time to catch up but they did us proud! Little Asher is quite a nice specimen of what a grandchild should be. Joining the ranks of BarliantWisch Grandchildren, he looks well suited to hold his own with Alex and Ashley. Now he fills out the ranks of the 3A's in our family.

Mom (and dad) braved a 40 hour labor to introduce him to the world. The adventure took some weird twists. Jeannine called after her examination on Thursday to say that we didn't need to come charging up on Friday. She was not going anywhere fast. So, we canceled our flight and hotel and decided to wait for the water to break (which I thought happened at 10pm on Saturday night but didn't really happen until just before Asher slid home).

We got a flight on Sunday morning, charged over to the new house just in time to see Jeannine leaving with Jessica (the Doula) and Aaron on the way to the hospital for the second time. It was a nice little reception... we stayed up all night and flew up early and Jeannine came out of her house and said, "Go away, leave me alone, AND DON'T TAKE ANY PICTURES!"

Then her head spun around three times and green pea soup came spewing out. Off they went to the hospital. I'm glad doula's don't carry guns since hers didn't know who we were and was very protective of our little baby. This trip to the hospital, however, was the charm and ten hours later little Asher arrived.

Here are some movies and photos. I will post them as they become available, until the kid is 9 days old. Then he gets treated just like any other valuable member of the BarliantWisch website... you know, with disrespect, humor and embarrassment. He gets weenie-whacked on Monday and, as you know, that is the end of innocence for any Jewish boy. (There won't be any photos of that event, I guarantee you... not even I'm that cruel.) Why dozen's of people would fly to watch a little kid get his weenie whacked is beyond me, although I do remember the joke about the two little kids in the kindergarten bath room... One asks the other, "Have you ever heard about circumcision?" The other says, "Heard about it? I had it done!" The first one asks, "Did it hurt?" The second one answers, "I'll say! Afterward, I couldn't walk for a year!"

Day One "Still tired from the move."
It's A Boy! QuickTime movie This is a bigger file but better quality. Requires QuickTime Player from Apple	It's A Boy! Windows Movie This is a faster download for Windows Media Player. (Typical crappy Windows quality.)		(Perhaps not the first but certainly the) Official New Baby Family Portrait.		He already looks like a winner. His cousins Alex and Ashley will be his friend.		Jessica, without whom this wouldn't have been possible. She is a Doula and is very, very protective of her charge. (Ask me how I know!)
"Yeah, it was tough. Really. It was. Don't be fooled by my appearance. It was really, really tough. I'm not kidding..."	The first official Mommy and Grand mommy photo.						Talking to Grandma Bernice on the phone.
Photo Removed Due to Mother's objection.	"Hi. I'm Dad. I'm really, really tired. Really."		Photo Removed Due to Mother's objection.		Photo Removed Due to Mother's objection.
"Hey Asher, Welcome to my world!"	Delilah holds the baby.		Alex and Delilah.
							Lord Voldomort says, "The Child is Mine! Buahhhhhhha. Bring me my wand, Wormtail." (Ask Aunt Rachael... she knows all.)

Day Two "Everybody talks to me like I'm an idiot."
DJ and The Boss examine some part of the kid.	Hangin' out.		Neen talks to Grandma Bernice. I get the kid.		Grandma DJ		Grandma Sharon
Asher and me.	A view with the room.		Handing Asher off to Noah. Jeannine is enjoying something.		The footprint card.		Uncle Noah looks like a pro.
Checking the forms.	Signing the Birth Certificate.		With Char... (Hey Sari... No pressure here! ...NOT!!!)		The 4 Cohen's		With Judith.
Neen checks out the website.	Sunset from the room.		Yep... miracles do happen. This is hers.		Has any Neen been more happy than this? Story to the right --->		She (figure out which "she" is she) said that Neen can drink beer. She cannot be quoted on this but I'm pretty sure she also said that beer is good for the mother and the baby. That's why Neen is smiling.
Day Three The trip home. Asher moves into new digs.
Grandma decided that decorations were in order.	So she picked out various things that I got to tape up high.		She got a big bottle that waves in the wind and will do so until it hits the thorns and pops.		The Welcome Home sign is a nice touch. Asher seemed to like it (or maybe it was just gas).		Grandma cleaned the kitchen, floor, bedroom, bathroom and started sweeping the garden but I stopped her because I was getting exhausted watching. (OK, I did help a little. I unloaded the dish washer and bought dinner.)
Asher gets the home floor advantage from dad.						Asher is trying to figure out who this woman is.
Welcome Home Movie #1 in Windows Welcome Home Movie #1 in MP4		Welcome Home Movie #2 in Windows Welcome Home Movie #2 in MP4		Crying at home Movie in WMV Crying at home Movie in MP4		This is Jessica's card with the id removed. If you want to call her, email Jeannine and she will give you her phone number and email.
Day Four "Let's get the heck outa here!"
"Sweetie, mommy loves you!"		Dad discovers the value of a baby sling.		The first walk outside since coming home. Neen meets a 7 month old who will probably do things that Asher can't do at 7 months. But Asher will have less hair so it is understandable. Also, Asher won't be able to eat solid food until then. (Purina is a tough act to follow.)		Grandma discovers the value of a baby sling, too.
Day Five Meeting the family, watch the Series with Dad and getting punchy at home, too.
Hey Asher, meet your Aunt Rachael	"Hi, little guy! Welcome to the family!"		"Yep... he's one of us."		This is a present from your Cousin Ashley.		Ashley wanted Asher to have a candy bucket for his first Halloween.
Only four days into this and Aaron is a diapering pro.	Hey, Dad... Good Job!		Does Aaron know how to roll a baby burrito or what?!		How many Jewish boys does it take to change a light bulb? The Quick Time Movie The Windows Movie		Well, it's time that Asher earns his keep. He will become a baby toy for a while. The Quick Time Movie The Windows Movie
Yep... he's a Cohen kid... likes to watch the World Series with Dad.
	Sandra says, "Asher, you crack me up!"
Life as I know it from now on. Asher has breathing, eating, sleeping and pooping down cold. From this point forward, life is simply going to be life.

"... except for today, life has been pretty good so far. I woke up, got fed, pooped, peed on Dad, ate, slept, pooped some more and so on. Then I found myself surrounded by strangers, found myself suckin' on wine (pretty good stuff! I like it! "Please, sir, some more?") then my little weenie got whacked. Wow... the pain made my eyes water. (It made my Grandfather's eyes water, too. The other Grandfather has photographic evidence.) I heard the Rabbi tell everyone why this was an important ritual but take it from me, you can do without this as a daily activity. At least I got three hours of uninterrupted sleep thanks to Mogan David Concord Grape Wine." "They tell me that the worst is over. Now I can get about the business of living and trying to avoid people pinching my cheek and telling me how cute I am. Grandpa Nowell says to "get over it" because it "ain't gonna happen" because I am cute. Oh, well, guess I'll eat and poop some more and start growing up. Thanks for watching my first week. C-ya soon." Asher Leon Cohen.